Well I took a 2 month hiatus from blogging to start a new job and get everyone adjusted to my new schedule, new school year, sports, etc. Honestly I didn’t want to be away this long, but that’s how life goes sometimes. The last 2 months have been difficult here for us. Not with my new job, I love that and enjoy going to work, but the kids have been an especially difficult aspect in my life lately. There have been a lot of struggles and parenting fails here lately and tears shed by kids and mom alike. That’s not what I’m going to write about today though. Today I am going to write about my weekend and my parents anniversary party. I’ll get back to my struggles with the kids later.
On September 18, 2015 my parents had their 50th Wedding anniversary and on October 21st, my dad turned 75. This past Saturday, we went to their house for a “birthaversary” celebration. It wasn’t anything big, but it was great. My family and I spent a few hours with my parents, some Aunt’s and Uncles, my sister, brother-in-law and niece and a friend of my parents. In my parent’s house that night we got to share stories with people who have been married for a combined 169 years! (Mom and Dad 50 yrs., Aunt Arlene and Uncle Ray 49yrs., Aunt Sheila and Uncle Clem 48yrs. and my sister Christy and her hubby Andy 22 years). My other Aunt and Uncle were unable to make it due to my Uncle being hospitalized but they have been married like 53 years! It’s awe inspiring and humbling being able to talk about my family and their marriages. Truly inspiring and creates nice feeling of hope and joy for me.
We ate and looked at Mom and Dad’s wedding album from 1965, had cake with the same ingredients as their wedding cake, listened to stories about their wedding day and smiled as a few songs were sung to them by my Aunt’s and Uncle’s. They even cheered for Matt and I when Dad mentioned that our 8th anniversary is next month and we reminisced about my wedding day too. In this day and age of divorce and nontraditional families, it really does give me hope that I too might be celebrating my 50th Wedding anniversary with my kids there feeling the same feelings I felt on Saturday night.
I looked at my parents a few times throughout the night and thought about all they have endured and gone through and all the little memories I have in their house as it was the only house I remember living in as a kid (they bought it when I was 1 and still live there now, even though I want them to move into something smaller and more manageable for them). Looking at my Father who is now 75 is bittersweet for me, as he has always been my hero and is now looking a little “old” to me lately. Age kind of creeps up on you and then hits you right in the face. Mom and Dad are doing well despite their bodies slowing down on them. My mom will be having back surgery in December and she has been riddled with pain there for like the last year, so we are hopeful this will bring her relief and she can enjoy life without so much pain. Dad announced that he is now officially retired after working the last 21 years at Progressive Field (Jacob’s Field) which was the part time fun job he got when he retired from the fire department. Too bad the Cleveland Indians couldn’t have had a better season to send him off with! Damn Cleveland sports!!!
I asked Mom and Dad on their actual anniversary what the secret is to staying married for 50 years and my Dad said being able to compromise and Mom said not keeping things inside you when they are small cause it builds and builds and then you explode over nothing really. So what I’m hearing from them, the marriage experts is that communication is key. They are not perfect and are completely honest about that. They are always working on themselves too, which I feel is always important. How can you have a good marriage if you are not good yourself? Even through some awful times, they pulled together and weathered the storm, and now look, celebrating 50 years!!! It’s so awesome and rare and inspiring.
When we were driving home from the festivities, my wedding song came on the radio. It was really neat because it’s not a common song anymore (God Bless the Broken Road by Rascall Flatts) and I barely ever hear it on the radio. I do believe in divine intervention and the timing was perfect after spending the evening talking about weddings and marriage with our loved ones. It made me smile and think about my wedding day and marriage. Matt and I are just now getting to a great place in our relationship, which honestly has been tough over the last 8 years. I had to “blend” myself into not just his life but his 2 daughters lives as well, we had so many issues with Noah as a baby and finally get things better with that to have struggles with his behavior now, and Reagan although she is funny and smart and such a blessing, she has been rather difficult at times lately too. Matt and I have worked opposite schedules for 6 of the 8 years we’ve been married which presents different challenges and then mixing our stubborn and “set in our ways” mentalities has made for some interesting fights over the years too. I learned from my parents early on though that normal couples fight and its alright and completely normal. No one ever has a perfect relationship for any extended period of time with no arguments, disagreements or fights. It just isn’t real life. My parents didn’t fight often growing up, but when they did I was never worried because they always worked it out. I appreciate them so much for “keeping it real” to me as a youngster and never creating a fake sense of reality by trying to hide things or candy coat anything. Now I’m not trying say that they had all their disagreements in front of us kids and then made up and everything in front of us either. They were adults and took care of their business on their time, but because of them I got to know that arguments were going to happen and all would be ok after a while as long as you take the time to work through it. They always shared a small kiss when leaving and saying hello, went out to dinner almost every Friday night, enjoyed relaxing on the couch together and Church every Sunday. No matter what-all those things happened. Awe, I hope that I can be writing about Matt and I like this one day!!!!
Well, I’m going to wrap this up as I don’t have too much time to write. I had to share my experience this weekend as I am still reeling in joy over it.
Thank you Mom and Dad and I can’t wait to see what else is in store for you two.
Love you so much!!!